This is a long exerpt from her new book, but valuable reading to me at the moment. This whole idea of positive thinking is crap, in my opinion, and Ehrenreich does a much better job of explaining why than I ever could.
But I bet you’re thinking– “wait, Karen has such a positive attitude and is so brave! She can kick cancer’s ass!”
I might be able to kick cancer’s ass, but it won’t be because of a sunny disposition. I do my best to not be negative beause it’s not how I want to spend my time. But the time I’m getting here is from drugs and poison and aggressive treatment, and it has nothing to do with being positive or with wishful thinking. And if treatment doesn’t work and I die sooner rather than later, that’s not my fault either– we don’t give ourselves cancer if we’re negative or bitter people.
Everyone means well and no one knows what to say to someone with a Stage IV diagnosis. Believe me, I totally get that. And I take every well-wish and positive comment in the caring and loving spirit in which it’s given. But if one more person tells me, “be positive! you’ll beat this!” I’m going to puke on their shoes.